RMG Founder Kris Ruby was recently featured in The NY Post on staying connected with your ex’s after a break-up. Read the full article in The NY Post here
By Jennifer Wright, NY Post
The next time you’re tempted to show your ex how totally over your breakup you are by posting pictures on Facebook that show you frolicking on the beach with a new suitor, hold off.
Putting on a brave face after a split is nothing new. However, in these social-media-savvy days, people are putting that face online, and it’s not doing anyone much good.
“Staying connected with your exes on social media and bombarding them with a false sense of ‘happy’ or ‘sexy’ selfies is becoming a popular cultural phenomenon,” says Kris Ruby, the social media expert for the Ruby Media Group. “After a breakup, people are increasingly feeling more pressure to make it look like they are doing great on their social media accounts.”
But, she cautions, “I don’t think someone would see a photo of their ex Jet Skiing and think they made the wrong decision about the breakup . . . I strongly feel it always has the opposite effect.”
It can, however, succeed in hurting a past lover and diminishing what you had with them in the first place.
“It makes someone think you moved on faster than they did, and that the relationship wasn’t as meaningful to you as it was to them,” Ruby says.
Amanda Chatel, a 36-year-old blogger from the East Village, definitely fell victim to the trend. After her 2012 breakup, she felt a huge impetus to show her former flame that she was great.
“I hate to admit it, but I actually started my Instagram account to prove to my ex I was fine,” she says. “Oh, look at me being fine in Paris. Oh, now I’m fine in Barcelona. Oh, I’m so fine on this yacht in Lake Como. These aren’t tears. These are splashes of Champagne on my face as I celebrate how fine I am.”
It didn’t make her ex want to jump on a plane to be with her, but he took notice. “He’d occasionally send a drunken e-mail . . . acknowledging something I’d posted,” she recalls.
But it didn’t necessarily make her feel good. “I felt both sad and sort of satisfied that he was falling into my trap. I’d set up that Instagram for him, and voilà, there he was responding! But then I’d remember we were broken up and get shaky and cry.”
Courtney Boyd Myers, 29, the founder of audience.io, a digital marketing company, says that her ex’s reaction was also negative.
“In the early days after my recent breakup, I was sad but would only post happy things,” says Boyd Myers, a Williamsburg resident who ended a four-year relationship last April. “This angered him because he was seeing this upset side of me when no one else was.”
Rather than posting photos of the amazing summer you’re having with a new boyfriend or girlfriend (or someone you just met on Tinder) to show your ex that you have moved on, Ruby says the smartest strategy for all parties is to unfriend one another on Facebook, Instagram and the like. That’s the easiest way to really move on.
“In order to grieve and truly move on you need that time of separation, which includes social media separation as well,” she says.
“When you have finally moved on, you can refriend them.”
*Article reprint from NY Post, by Jennifer Wright.
Social Media expert and Ruby Media CEO, Kris Ruby was recently on Fox & Friends discussing the top social media story of the week: Internet Outrage. This trend seems to be sweeping the nation (and the net!). What leads people to engage in Internet Outrage?
People are going on the Internet to express their rage because it easier then expressing it in real life and they can hide behind a veil of anonymity. It is creating a toxic stream for people to follow and it often leads to friends/family/coworkers un-following you.
Social Media is still new and people are still figuring out how to use it. In a way, there are two things going on here when rage is at play. One is the violation of social media etiquette (ie. how could someone post something I vehemently disagree with?) and the other is the actual subject matter at hand.
My advice: if you wouldn’t bring it up at a dinner party or in front of a client, don’t post it on social media. I can’t imagine showing employees a photo of killing an animal (let alone boasting about it) so why would someone put that online? If you do in fact have weird hobbies that are likely to cause controversy, keep them to yourself- no need to publish them unless you are looking for a backlash.
People also need to think before they post (not only the people posting the controversial content, but the people posting responses to the content).
What is often more disturbing then the original content posted is people’s reaction to it.
Social Media Anger Management could go a long way!
What is Not OK to post in a moment of social media rage
Social Media leads to a “mob mentality”
The veil of anonymity in the web allows for abuse and cyber bullying. However, subsequent anger should NOT descend into bullying and a mob mentality. At what point should social media networks step in and remove hateful content? Whose responsibility is this really? Would love to hear your thoughts!
Social Media Expert & Ruby Media CEO Kris Ruby appeared live on Fox & Friends to discuss the hottest new apps and social media stories this week.
WHAT’S APP-ENING? KNOZEN
Social media expert and Ruby Media CEO, Kris Ruby, will be LIVE on Fox & Friends discussing the top stories in the nation. Be sure to tune in!
Social Media expert and Ruby Media CEO Kris Ruby will be LIVE on Fox & Friends this Sunday morning discussing the top apps, tech trends and social media stories of the week. Be sure to tune in!
Social Media Expert Kris Ruby was on Fox & Friends discussing ‘Nomophobia’ and the hottest stories in the nation.
Top Stories in the Nation- Ruby Weighs in!
Miss Delaware- Media Strategy Miss? There is a difference between a short term vs. long term media strategy. If you check social media, most people will side with Miss Delaware after her media appearance today. However, it will fizzle out quickly because she didn’t take advantage of the opportunity to tie this into a larger issue that many Americans face besides her- ageism. As a PR consultant, I would have told her to be cheery (not cry), to not complain and to keep her composure. She had an opportunity for America take her side on this (for the long term) if she shared her story and tied it into a larger issue of age discrimination. Don’t complain – the larger story here is ageism – raise awareness about that, not about losing your crown.
Friend Zone Do I think the friend zone exists? Absolutely! However, we are seeing a resurgence back to traditional methods of dating- and why not start with a friend you actually know vs. someone you have never met on an online dating app? We have seen countless movies about friends falling in love including:
Instead of looking at the friend zone as a bad place, view it as an opportunity to date someone who you already know really well!
Smartphone Dinner Etiquette DYK Nomophobia (fear of being without your smartphone) affects 40% of the population? The best way to leverage social media is to BE social, so you have content to post after your social activities on social media. The problem today is that everyone is actually being anti social with obsessive social media checking at the dinner table. Rather then being present and engaging with the people around them, they are using social media to replace their real life social interactions. My advice? If you want to succeed in your social life, put away your phone or you will irritate people so much that they won’t even want to take a photo with you after dinner to post on your social media! Focus on being present with those around you and forming real relationships.
Social Media expert and RMG CEO Kris Ruby discussing the new law giving French IT workers the right to be ‘legally unplugged’ after 6 pm.
Watch the full segment here
When Ruby Media Group was founded five years ago, social media and public relations were still viewed as different service categories for businesses. Executives wanted to jump on the social media bandwagon and were interested in either PR or social media.
Today, there are numerous social media companies all over this region, and all of the traditional PR agencies have added social media as one of their integral service offerings.
The agency model of the future is one that seamlessly combines PR and social media. Agencies that continue with the old model of only being a social media agency (without PR) or a PR agency (without social media capabilities) will be left behind. Today, clients want a full-service approach. From content creation to promotion and distribution, clients want one agency handling their social media and PR needs.
The top PR and social media changes over the past five years include:
• Social Driven PR: The days of “cold” pitching are dead. Social Media has changed the pitching process. Journalists now want to put a face to the avatar. Agencies that embrace the social driven PR model understand how to leverage these tools to get maximum exposure. With the plethora of data available to PR practitioners today, one of the biggest ways to get ignored by journalists is not to read what they write on social media. It is better to pitch a story to a journalist based on what they are writing about in that moment vs. pitching something that is not relevant to what they are covering.
• Data Analysis: Five years ago, executives wanted to know “What is social media and should I use it?” Today, executives want to know, “What is my social media content strategy and how can I maximize it to increase campaign results?” Expectations of social media measurement and analytics have also increased. Clients want to see an ROI (return on investment) on all social media and PR spends. Calculating media impressions, Facebook fan likes or website visits is not enough to stay competitive today. Social media and PR campaign goals must be linked to overall business objectives to create maximum results. Agencies that fully embrace this model will win in the new economy.
• Social Strategic Planning: The most effective campaigns today link back to an increase in overall business growth. For example, a successful campaign could be measured by an increase in new diners, members or customers by X percent. The best way to measure this is through benchmarking and data analysis. The expectation of PR practitioners as “data analysts” has become standard. Benchmarking is critical in determining campaign results.
• Interactive Sponsorships: From a PR and advertising perspective, there has been a big shift in client’s expectations on ROI of sponsorships. It is no longer enough to purchase a sponsorship to “get the brand out there.” Clients want to strategically align their brands with event sponsorships that link back to an increase in business. The sponsorship model of the future will be more interactive and give clients an opportunity to engage directly with prospects vs. standing behind a table collecting leads. The most effective sponsorships will embrace the new mindset of Westchester Executives and understand how to meet their needs.
• Traditional is back: We are seeing a renaissance back to traditional media. There is inherently more “trust” in the editorial offering of print based outlets vs. digital. With everyone as their own publisher, executives yearn for the fact checking that comes along with traditional media. High profile media mentions in print publications are still extremely important.
The old agency model is dead. Social media has become commoditized. The agencies that will win in social are those who are leveraging talent with strong journalism and graphic design skills. Content is king and the medium has become more visual. Look to hire former journalists or graphic designers when hiring social media content managers. Journalists know how to write copy that is compelling and elicits feedback from fans. Agencies that will win in the new economy will fully embrace an integrated, 360-degree approach to social media marketing and brand development.
Kristen Ruby is the CEO of Ruby Media Group, a full service public relations and social media agency in Westchester, Greenwich and Manhattan that is now 5 years old. Ruby Media Group specializes in creating strategic, creative and measureable PR and social media campaigns. For more information, visit rubymediagroup.com.
Read the full article here
You can now track your friends and family everywhere through numerous location tracking apps. Social Media Expert Kris Ruby, CEO of Ruby Media Group, discusses some of the top spying apps in the market today on FOX Business The Willis Report. Read More