Posts By: KrisRuby

Are you Digitally Compatible? How Social Media Differences Can Destroy Relationships

Social media can make or break a relationship.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZCvY1CBru4

 

Recently, I was on Hot 97 and Fox 5 NY “Street Soldiers” discussing How Social Media destroys relationships. It was a 20 minute special series on social media and relationships, and it also aired on Hot 97 for a full 40 minutes nationally. So, why am I sharing that information with you?

Because clearly, social media is having much more of an impact on relationships than people realize for a network to run a 20-minute special segment on this topic. The majority of this blog is written for business owners who are looking to increase exposure. But, many business owners are either in relationships or are searching for one, so this topic is important to address.

We are living in a new world today, where social media can have a substantial impact on your work relationships, personal relationships and even romantic relationships. To ignore this is to ignore the new reality of the world we are living in today. And when you have so many generational differences mixed with differing levels of digital connectedness, it can potentially be a recipe for disaster. So, it’s important to know if you are digitally compatible with someone on social media. It can have long term consequences on the health and longevity of the relationship if you are not. You may think, “How absurd!” If the relationship was strong enough to begin with, it could sustain differences in social media incompatibility.

Well, if that were true, you wouldn’t see social media being cited in as many divorce cases and litigation and you also wouldn’t see so many relationships fail to launch as a direct result of social media. I am touching on a phenomenon here that many people experience in a very real way, yet few have actually talked about it. The primary reason for this being that we have not adequately explored the societal role of social media on long term relationships due to the fact it is still a relatively new phenomenon. The more we address this and put a label to it, the easier it can be to determine if we are a match with someone in all of the ways that matter (because digital compatibility DOES matter).

It is a cop-out to say that strong relationships can sustain these digital incompatibilities. People are addicted to social platforms, often more than they are to their relationships. They can even serve as a primary attachment portal in place of a relationship because of the dopamine rush people get from the likes that they can’t get In real life. Before you write off this concept, consider if you have ever had an argument with your significant other or with someone you have dated because of differences in social media views. It is pretty safe to say that every couple at one point has had at least one argument over what is appropriate to post vs. what isn’t along with a plethora of other social media related issues and its impact on the relationship.

10 Social Media Signs You are Digitally Incompatible

Here are ten things to consider to determine if you are digitally compatible with someone:

1)    Your partner cares more about their personal brand than the relationship.  If your newsfeed is entirely dedicated to friends and family posts, but your partner’s newsfeed is all about their career, there may be a problem. Discuss this early on in your relationship. Your partner may be reluctant to introduce a new relationship on their feed because they only want to use social media to promote their latest career achievements. Or perhaps their company monitors their social media channels, and they don’t want to give out any personal information. You, on the other hand, use social media to share things you do with your family and friends. You can’t understand why your partner isn’t incorporating you into their digital presence. Their constant self-promotion may also leave a bad taste in your mouth.  Without expressing your feelings about this, it can lead to hurt feelings and resentment.

2)    Your partner is ambivalent about committing publicly.  Announcing that you are in a relationship on social media shows a level of commitment to your new partner. If you post a relationship status or tag them in photos, but your partner doesn’t, it might make you look more committed to the relationship than your partner.

3)    You post more about the relationship than your partner does.  Maybe you post more about your relationship than your partner does.  Do you see that as you being more committed to the relationship than they are? If someone resists sharing information about you with their circle on social media, it could show that they are resistant to sharing you in all aspects of their life.

4)    You haven’t connected with your partner’s friends and family online. Do your partner’s family and friends show an interest in your life on social media? For example, has your partner ‘friended’ 15 of your friends and family on Facebook, but you haven’t connected with any of their friends and family? Why is it so lopsided? Is your partner afraid to fully integrate you into their life? If you have connected with your partner’s family online, do they like your posts or ignore them? Everyone wants to feel digitally connected with their partner’s family. If not, it is a red flag that may be indicative of a larger issue. Partners should feel digitally supported in the relationship by both families, not just one!

5)    Your partner posts photos that make them look single. Does your partner post photos to maintain the appearance that they are single?  If so, this can cause animosity and make your partner feel you are still seeking outside digital attention.  This is different if your career requires it. For example, you are an Instagram influencer and your job is to maintain this appearance in the fashion world to sell more dresses. Regardless, you need to be with a partner who understands this and supports it. Be clear with your social media motivations up front to avoid any miscommunication. Are you willing to give up posting sultry photos on Instagram if it offends your partner? If not, make that clear before you get too deep into the relationship.

6)    You have generational differences with your partner. Keep in mind that there are major social media differences between Baby Boomers and Millennials. For example, a millennial may expect their partner to view their Instagram story every day, like all their photos and comment on their posts. If the boomer is not active on social media, yet it is a core need for the millennial, it should be discussed before there is conflict.  See if you can compromise on social media viewing habits and frequency. If not, you may be digitally incompatible.

7)    Your partner thinks you over share and post too frequently. Your partner may see your need to post 10 Instagram stories a day as narcissistic and indicative of someone who may not make a great mate and needs constant attention and stimulation. Others may see someone’s daily posting of self-promotional and personal branding posts as too “me-centric” and may make a judgment on the bandwidth of emotional availability if they are so career focused. In this sense, even though it may be a snap judgment, social media can be a good predictor of larger personality traits based on someone’s usage of social networks. Pay close attention to this and to how their social media habits make you feel.

8)    You have a different definition of micro cheating. Don’t underestimate the power of micro cheating on social media. Micro cheating is any minor action that makes your partner feel snubbed on social media channels. If it makes you feel uncomfortable, you should express that to your partner, and your views should be respected. If they can’t respect your views, you may not be digitally compatible. Social Media should not be such a constant strain in the relationship, and if it is- there are more significant issues to address.  If your partner feels controlled by your needs of not wanting them to follow members of the opposite sex on social media, it may show a larger incompatibility with social/political issues and values. It can also be indicative of other problems that can emerge in the relationship. For example, if you feel uncomfortable with them connecting with new people on social media they haven’t yet met, you may feel uncomfortable with them hanging out with members of the opposite sex in real life.

9)    Your partner thinks “likes” equal support. As soon as you post something, your partner has already liked it. For some people, likes equate to support, but for others, likes have an entirely different value system. Perhaps they want to support you in real life with a hug instead of a like. They may also feel like the partners “like” means much less if you have a group of fans who like everything you do as soon as you post. This could dilute the overall value of their like and could make them feel like just another fan. Your partner may also feel intimidated by your social media harem. If 50 people like your post, do you care more about their likes or your partners 1 measly like? Some people feel intimidated by this and think it’s just too much to compete with.

10)    Your partner shares more with their audience than they do with you.  In the old days, if you had big news to share, you would share it with your partner first and then call friends and family. Today with social media, your partner can often be last to know if you post the news first for all to find out. Perhaps you have a very busy job and just want to get the news out, but if you are with someone with traditional values, this will feel like a slap in the face.  Some people won’t slow down to share things with their partner first before sharing it with the world on social media. If you are uncomfortable learning about your partner’s day on social media rather than through them directly, you may not be a match.

Take social media intel seriously and use the behavioral data to determine if you are a good match with someone. Digital compatibility is just as important as real-world compatibility in today’s dating world. To ignore it is to ignore a new reality of dating. If you don’t like the idea of being with someone who posts a new professional achievement daily online to push their personal brand forward, can you really be a match long-term? Or will you always feel uncomfortable every time you refresh your newsfeed?

Instead of ignoring these feelings, we should be facing them head on much earlier on in the dating process. People make the mistake of ignoring their gut instincts or saying it’s “just social media” but social media is a further extension of our lives, and every aspect of our lives should feel fully integrated and comfortable for the people we choose to spend our time with, both online and offline.



Digital Strategist Kris Ruby Discusses How Publications Increase Revenue In A ‘Grow or Die’ Environment

Social Media Strategist Kris Ruby CEO of Ruby Media Group recently joined Cheddar live from The New York Stock Exchange to discuss innovative ways the publishing industry is changing the way it looks at revenue and why companies are investing in millennial talent.

In this video, Kris Ruby discusses:

  • Why a recent study showed a positive outlook for magazine media and what to make of the outlook.
  • How media companies are taking a new approach to making money
  • How social media plays a role in media companies making money and if it is truly a reliable revenue source
  • How other companies can keep up when Facebook and Google have a combined 57.1% of market share this year

PLUS the answer to…

  • Is there any money to be made in print or is it all in digital?

Watch to find out!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zeWZbxjOJHg

 



NY Social Media Strategist Kris Ruby on Fox News Discussing Social Media Algorithms

NYC Social Media Strategist Kris Ruby of Ruby Media Group was recently on Fox News discussing social media algorithms.  YouTube linked the Notre Dame fire to 9/11 and Twiter wrongly flagged tweets for sensitive content. Why can’t social media platforms get it right? Watch to find out. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abjOW5jZFlo&t=20s

news,


Social Media Influencer Marketing: How to Work With Instagram Influencers to Grow Your Brand

 

 

Grow your Instagram audience by working with influencers.

Want to gain visibility in front of millions of Instagram users? Consider influencer marketing in your integrated marketing communications strategy.

A social media influencer has the power to sway opinions and impact the purchasing behavior of others in a specific target area and demographic. The more specific and targeted the clout, the more influence they have through social media marketing. An influencer’s job is to try new experiences, activities, products and foods, etc., and let others know about them through their unique lens. Consumers trust the opinions of influencers and are more likely to try these experiences and activities that the influencer deems “cool” and worthy of checking out. Influencer marketing also relies heavily on visual content marketing to “show” an experience as a way to sell it. Influencers can “influence” through organic product placement, Instagram takeovers, Instagram Live video content, Instagram stories or static branded Instagram feed posts.

How We Evolved from Bloggers to Micro-influencers

Traditionally, we relied on journalists to review experiences, try new foods and products and let us know their opinions.  With the rise of social media, consumers are becoming increasingly more dependent on influencers to decide where to go, what to buy and what to do.

The trend of influencer marketing originally started with bloggers and has now headed in the direction of “micro influencers.” Many influencers today don’t even have a blog. All of their content resides within their social media platforms. The evolution from long-form blogging to short-form influencer marketing has to do with shorter attention spans, the rise of visual marketing, and how people want to consume content. Today, influencers have to show what they are doing or selling instead of writing about it.

Influencers become popular because people began to trust third-party endorsements from Public Relations rather than traditional advertising. There is a difference between saying “Check me out, I am great,” vs. “Check her out, she is great.” Consumers want recommendations from people they know and trust and influencer marketing provides that. If they feel like they have a digital relationship with influencers, and the influencer puts their stamp of approval on something, consumers are often more likely to trust the endorsement.

The Difference Between a Blogger and an Influencer

Bloggers write on a website through traditional means, while influencers “influence” through social media channels such as Instagram feed posts or Instagram Stories. Bloggers typically spend more time on long-form content creation, whereas influencers devote more time to visual content creation and less time on the writing of the content around it.

How a Social Media Influencer Can Help Your Business 

Influencers can help tap into new markets in your target audience that you otherwise may have had to spend more money to reach. While influencer marketing should not be your entire marketing campaign, it should be an important component in the PESO model of an integrated marketing communications plan.  However, it is imperative to note that influencer marketing is only one component of your marketing campaign. It cannot replace an entire communications plan and should be complemented by other forms of traditional public relations, advertising, social media marketing, and content marketing.

What You Gain From Working With an Influencer

You may be wondering why you should have to pay a social media influencer to promote your business. After all, you are already providing them with complementary services or products to review, so why should you have to pay a fee beyond comped services? In addition to reviewing your product or service, social media influencers are providing you with content that you can reuse for other purposes to market your business. Additionally, an influencer’s job isn’t as simple as posting something on social media and is often more complex than you may realize. Here is a behind-the-scenes look at what social media influencers do to make sure your business gets the most out of a sponsored post or social media endorsement:

Social Media Influencers:

  • Find and vet relevant social media-worthy opportunities
  • Coordinate the actual photos of the experience either on their own or by hiring outside photographers
  • Research new angles on the same topics to see how their post and images can gain more visibility and “likes.”
  • Choose the right photo for the post
  • Conduct Hashtag and tagging research to increase post visibility and proper sponsored post tagging
  • Write an engaging caption to draw interest
  • Make sure the photo looks aesthetically pleasing with the rest of their feed
  • Execute sponsored posts complying with brand guidelines without appearing overly staged or promotional
  • View social media post statistics and engagement metrics to see what content is performing better

How to Effectively Work with an Instagram Influencer

If you are thinking about working with a social media influencer to promote your brand or product, here are 5 things to keep in mind before engaging them:

  1. Vet the influencer. Many social media influencers tout their inflated follower counts to show that they have a higher following than they actually do. Check to see if their followers are real or just bots. One way to do this is to look at the ratio of followers to the number of likes and comments. Check to see if the comments are organic or spam that could have been bought through a third-party app or platform.
  2. Ask to see the influencer’s media kit. Vetting an influencer doesn’t just stop at how many followers they have. You also want to vet the previous work they have done with other brands. Ask for their current media kit as well as any success metrics for previous campaigns they have worked on with brands. Also, review the social media channels of companies they have done influencer marketing work with as possible referral sources and to look at the final branded posts.
  3. Do your research. Where do their primary followers reside? For example, if you are a hyper-local business, do you want to engage with an influencer who has a national or international platform? While the influencer can build great buzz about your product or company and get new followers for you, it will not be profitable if none of the followers are actually in your market. Sometimes, it is better to engage an influencer with a smaller following if those followers convert to profitable customers in your region than to work with a large influencer who has followers that will only lead to vanity metrics. “Likes” do not necessarily equal new customers and profitability. Understand the difference before engaging an influencer.
  4. Get it in writing. Make sure you are protected by having them sign an influencer marketing contract.  Carefully outline what is expected of the influencer. For example, do they have final control over creative or do you? How long will the post stay up after it has gone live? Are you supplying copy for the post or will the influencer? Will the influencer allow your logo or text on their post or do they want visual marketing with no overlay? Are they okay with your branding or can the branding be used only if it is natively embedded in the image in an organic format? All details should be worked out before the project begins.
  5. Outline creative control. One of the scariest parts of working with an influencer is the lack of creative control. The influencer will be sharing their review of your product — what they like (and don’t like!) about the product to remain authentic. Additionally, the influencer will have their own branding aesthetic which may not match the branding aesthetic you envisioned in the final post. For example, if you are looking for the influencer to post product shots but they post photos of them with the product instead, you may be disappointed. It is important to understand the level of control you will have over the final post and its aesthetic. If you want to have final control, specify it in writing. Most influencers want to show their followers how the product fits in with their lifestyle, which may be different than how you or your CMO envisions the post. Have open lines of communication with the influencer before you agree to a deal.

Influencer Marketing Checklist

✓    Is their branding similar to yours?

✓    Does the influencer have devoted followers?

✓    Is their content high-quality?

✓    Are their captions well written?

✓    Are their followers engaged with their content?

✓    Are their followers aligned with your target audience?

Key Takeaways

✓    Just because an influencer has a small following does not mean they are not worth looking at.

✓    Likes do not equal engagement.

✓    Influencers typically want to control how your product is shared creatively.

✓    Influencers have their own branding aesthetic that may not match yours.

✓    Let the influencer see how the product fits into their lifestyle.

✓    Audiences will respond better to authentic and organic content creation.

✓    Make sure the influencer’s followers are in your target market.

✓    Consider an influencers engagement rate, quality of followers and other brands they have worked with.

✓    Appropiately tag branded content on Instagram as “paid sponsorship” posts.

✓    An influencer’s loyalty will always be to their audience first.

The Future of Influencer Marketing

In the future, every person with an Instagram or other popular social media account will see that they, too, can become influencers. So, if you can’t afford to hire an influencer, consider your sphere of influence. Anyone can be an influencer; you just have to be willing to put in the work. Once you realize that you can be an influencer, you will recognize the power of your brand on digital platforms. The key is to define your niche and target audience and stick to it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLBMAGX5HDY

For additional information on influencer marketing, check out the article “Becoming an Influencer: A Look at the Emergence of the Influencer”



Ruby Media Group CEO Kris Ruby Speaks at Westchester County Executive’s First Women’s Empowerment Breakfast

Over 1,000 Women Celebrated International Women’s Day at the inaugural Women’s Empowerment Breakfast held by Westchester County Executive George Latimer on March 8th at Purchase College.

In the spirit of empowerment, inspiration and encouraging women across all boundaries to recognize their own potential, Westchester County hosted #WOWConversations, a Women’s Empowerment Breakfast and dialogue with Westchester women in business. The event was created to bring together women of different backgrounds, professions and experiences, to celebrate community and the commitment to supporting one another. With a diverse panel of public servants and business owners, the Professional Women of Westchester shared their own personal stories and obstacles they overcame to achieve success.

The event was moderated by Lisa Reyes, an Anchor with News 12 Westchester and featured a Keynote with Bonnie Saran, Owner of Little Crepe Street. The panel discussion focused on the strengths of women and the barriers they crossed to become successful.

Panelists included Kris Ruby, Founder of Westchester Public Relations Firm Ruby Media Group, Mahjabeen Hassan, MD, Chairwoman of the American Muslim Women’s Association, Ruth Hassell-Thompson, Former New York State Senator and Special Advisor for Policy and Community Affairs, Laura Newman, Senior Director of Institutional Giving at Manhattanville College and Jin Wang, Creative Director of Fait Accompli Group.

Westchester County Executive George Latimer and Ruby Media Group CEO Kris Ruby 

News 12 Westchester Lisa Reyes and Ruby Media Group CEO Kris Ruby 


Westchester NY Publicist Kris Ruby to Speak at Westchester County Government’s Women’s Empowerment Breakfast

 

Celebrate International Women’s Day at Westchester County Government’s Women’s Empowerment Breakfast. Westchester County Executive George Latimer invites you to join us for a panel discussion focusing on empowering women and moving forward. Kris Ruby, CEO of Westchester Public Relations Firm Ruby Media Group,  will be a panelist at the breakfast. Over 700 attendees have already registered to attend. RSVP to Communications@WestchesterGov.com

Friday, March 8
8 to 11 a.m.